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cottonpicker
#
say whats on my mind hmmm

I guess it all starts somewhere. I am on house arrest and it just so happens to be the hottest two weeks for Alaska. Its been in the late 70s early 80s but since im stuck inside its 10 degrees hotter. so I am sitting in a room that is about 95 degrees and watching as everyone jumps in their bathingsuits and run through the water into the pool.  I have sweat so much in the last few weeks that I may have lost 15 lbs. I have even spent my time looking for work and working on losing weight. So far so good.

 

My boyfriend is still in Afganistan he will be back in Januaray but I have decided to send him somethings like dog tags with a picture of us and anime he loves it. My uncle is one of the voices on the anime shows so I got a great deal.

 

I am alittle tired but I am working on getting things done. My baby sister is prego now so I have to do what I can to help her and the baby. I need a nap im getting light headed. I will be back again. take care everyone.

No cotton pickeds - start picking
 
#
A Shay Day......humani... at its best
 I came across this in an email and it really made me think that maybe all isnt lost in our generation. Some people still have a heart out there. this made me cry and if you do to then you understand why.
 
 
Two Choices

What would you do? You make the choice. Don't look for a punch line, there isn't one. Read it anyway. My question is: Would you have made the same choice?

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: 'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?'

The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. 'I believe that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human n! ature p resents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.'

Then he told the following story:

Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?'  Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.'

Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. His Father watched with a small tear ! in his e ye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.

At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was p! utting wi nning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher

The game would now be over. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first! Run to first!' Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-e yed and startled.

Everyone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!' Catching his breath,! Shay a wkw ardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball .. the smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.

All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay'

Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third! Shay, run to third!'

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!' Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit t! he gran d sl am and won the game for his team.

'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'.

Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!

AND NOW A LITTLE FOOTNOTE TO THIS STORY: We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate. The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces.

If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out t he people in your address book who aren't the 'appropriate' ones to receive this type of mes! sage. W ell, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference. We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the 'natural order of things' So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice: Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?

A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats it's least fortunate amongst them.



May your day, be a Shay Day.
No cotton pickeds - start picking
 
#
IN A DAY (a couple pages of a book I wrote)

I am going to have my book published in a few months and I would like to know what you all think of it. Here are a couple pages of it.

 

Its called IN A DAY.

 

It indeed seemed like a boring day until he showed up. You know the one. He shows up at your door step right when your life couldn’t get any worse, it’s not a good thing when he shows up or atleast you thought that when you saw him. I thought the day was going to be fucked up but then he surprised me. I came home just as I would another day and he was in my living room don’t ask me what he did while in there but I was surprised to find him in there. I asked what he was doing and he replied the same. I told you I was coming and I have to stay. I know I should have said no but the sign on the door said welcome. I sat on my couch and tried to relax. He came from the kitchen with a glass. Drink this you'll feel much better. I went for the glass and noticed that it was fizzing. I told him thanks but I'll be okay. He said its okay I didn’t put anything in it. As he put the glass to his lips and held real still I could tell he didn’t want to. He took a sip as the cup left his lip he turned away. I don’t know what he was doing but he turned back and handed me the glass. Just drink it, it will help you sleep. I gave in and watched as he left the room. Took the vase off the table and poured the glass into it. I could hear him coming back so I pretended to fall asleep. He came in and slapped my face. I acted as if I couldn't feel. He carried me upstairs and rolled me into a blanket. Then he left the room. I got up and went to the window. I could see him outside backing up the car to the house. I grabbed my phone and called for help. I could hear him coming up the stairs. I hurried to get in the blanket without making a sound. He come in the room and grabbed the blanket. As my body jerked I felt as if they would never make it. I didn’t give them the plates from the car. I just kept my eyes shut and tried not to scream. My head thumping as it hits the stairs. I could feel my body slipping out of the blanket. He picks me up and halted me over his shoulder and throws me in the trunk of the car. I could tell the trunk was closed by the loud thud or it could have been just my mind going. I was getting tired and my head was bleeding through the blanket. I could hear ringing or is it the sirens?

 

I wasn’t real clear on where I may be. We had stopped about an hour ago and I have yet to hear him move. I don’t want to make a sound. I fear he is listening, waiting for the right moment. After a few hours I dosed off. I woke to a door slamming. Someone was coming to the trunk I could hear them. More than one, as the key hole started to jingle all I could thing was "keep your head down, keep your head down. Don’t open your eyes to look just act like your still out cold." The trunk door was now open I could feel the light on my face. It wasn’t long before they had me out the trunk and into another vehicle. I could feel the hands of the man who was holding me. His hands where shriveling I couldn’t tell if he was scared or just excited. I opened my eye just a little to a point where I could see but you couldn’t tell that my eye was open.  It was a police officer! I couldn’t figure it out. Why where the police working with him? Did he have the phone tapped? Did he know that I was faking? I just relaxed and stayed calm till I could figure out what was going on. The trunk of this vehicle smelled musty.  Like a sweat box. I felt trapped. Unable to move breath or see anything at all. We came to a stop and the trunk swung open. The figure behind the light started beating me to a pulp I could not breathe. I could feel my bones braking. My chest felt as if it were clasping. Every breath I took hurting me more and more. He finally stopped. I blacked out; when I woke I was in a small room with no windows or doors. I could not figure out how I got in it. I still was having trouble breathing and I could barley move. There where video cameras in every corner of the room. A bed sat at one corner of the room and a light hung above on the ceiling. I tried to look around for a door or a secret passage to the outside but all I could find was a hole in the wall that was labeled FOOD. What have I gotten myself into?

 

 

I am scared I will admit to that. But what I can’t understand is why he would do this to me. What have I done to deserve this? I just sat there trying to figure things out. I feel really weak and I can’t breathe much. I can tell my bones are broken. I must have fallen asleep I woke up a few hours later. I thought it was a few hours anyway. I was feeling a little better. Who ever put me here wants me to get better. While I was out they badge me and put me on an IV. I wondered if they just beat me to make sure I hadn’t woken yet. Or did he see me when I opened my eyes.  I had nothing but time. I decided to cooperate with them so that my bones could heel and I could think of some way of getting out. He sent some food through the hole in the wall. It was a foiled sandwich and a glass of water. There were also pills that he labeled " FOR PAIN" and "TO SLEEP" I don’t know which ones are which and I don’t want to take the chance of being knocked out for another couple of days. I picked up the ones that said "FOR PAIN" and pretended to take them. I took the other ones as a test to see if they were sleeping pills. I know it’s not the best way to do it but atlest I will know which ones are which. I few hours later I was out like a light. I don’t get why I am here. Why haven’t they tried to do something to me? They haven’t even talked to me. I wonder if they will leave me here to die. It just doesn’t make any sense. I woke from a dream and quickly realized it wasn’t a dream. I was feeling a lot better and the IV was gone. I started looking for a door or light coming from cracks in the wall. I found a door. It looks like just part of the wall but it was a real door. I couldn’t believe it. As soon as I tried to find an opening a voice stopped me. Hello is anyone there? Please help me. I could hear another woman’s voice. It startled me. I really didn’t expect to hear another woman’s cry for help.  

 

 

No cotton pickeds - start picking
 
#

Im not sure if I believe in any kind of luck but I am sure that I am in the worse condition of my life right now. I really would like my love to come home and I want to tell him whats going on but he is already upset over there so I have decited to just write it all here. So a month ago I got arrested for drinking and driving then last friday I had court and was sentance to 3 years probation 3 days of jail time 1 year of ignition interlock and go to classes. After court I was called by my boss to call the president of the company and so I did and he wanted to know why it was I didnt call him when I was arrested. I told him that I had told my manager and his reaction was you didnt contact me and for that I will have to let you go. I asked why I was being let go and his answer was for breaking the policy. What an asshole. After that a few guys shot up my house looking for my brother. I also dont have the money to get my truck out. Then there is the thing with my parents my mother is going through minapuase and my dad is a druggy. So shes bitchy and he is stealing all my money.

I think I am done venting everyone have a good night.

No cotton pickeds - start picking
 
#

So yesterday was my baby's (my boyfriends) Birthday. I had it all planned out to have him call me on his birthday since I am unable to call him while he is in afganistan. My first mistake was that I went out with friends on tuesday. I didnt drink or anything but my friend got very drunk and jumped into a cab with a bunch of guys and I couldnt get her out. We went to this house and she basically made out with two of the guys while I was trying to get us a ride home. My phone died and she wouldnt give me hers so I just sat on a chair and waited for her to be ready to go. I fell asleep and she took off and didnt bother waking me up. I found out from the guys that when one of the guys came out of the back room they turned the livingroom light on and she looked over at the guy she was with and freaked out saying that he wasnt the same guy she was messing around with. When I fell asleep it was the same guy so I dont know. well I asked for a ride and they said they werent going my way. right assholes just cause my friend didnt fuck you it doesnt give you a right to be a dick to me. So with my phone dead I started walking I find out that I am on the south side of town and I live on the east side. So I tried to turn my phone on. it was on long enough for me to make one call to the last caller on my phone. Thank God he answered and right when I said were I was my cell died. I didnt know if he got what I said so I just kept on walking. He did hear me and he showed up after 6 blocks. The second mistake I made was not using the only charger in the house before my father went to work. I had something to eat and immedately got sick I was throwing up all day and night I even had to call in sick to work. By the time I got a charger It was already 10 at night wednesday night. I was still not feeling good and I thought I put it on the charger and went back to sleep. When I woke the next morning I hadnt and now I had no charger. I still feeling sick got up took my mother to work and dropped my siblings off at school. I got home to find my internet wasnt working so I was unable to wish him happy birthday over the internet so it just made my day worse. I went to work at 5 and my mother dropped off my new charger and I was able to charge my phone. Now I have internet and a phone but I feel like he may be mad at me because he did call and he did write me and I never answered him. I dont want him to think I forgot his birthday and I wrote him and told him but he isnt on and I feel really bad because he got the day off and everything so he could talk to me for a few hours and I messed it all up.

 

I love my baby and I really miss him the last thing I want is for him to be mad at me. What else can I do to make it up to him.

No cotton pickeds - start picking
 
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